I Find Joy: Life Story of a Testimony Part II

Picking up where I left off in my last post, I knew had a testimony of Jesus Christ as my Savior and redeemer. So as that show ended, what was going to be next? I was taking classes at the University of Utah and pretty much all of my friends were involved with SOTW. Well a lot of the cast were talking about auditioning for the Nauvoo Pageant and spending a month or so of my last summer before a mission in a historic place like Nauvoo, once again performing for the Lord sounded like a pretty good deal to me. Then on New Year’s Eve my friend from the show, Mike, told me about something he did that past summer in Nauvoo, related to the Pageant; Young Performing Missionaries, or YPMs. He said that the callbacks were coming up and that the Directors had told him that if he knew anyone that was interested and that he thought could hack it, that they would give said person a look. I became that said person and ended up getting into the callback.

I remember the all day callback process as being just wonderful. I spent my whole day with talented and spiritually alive people in an atmosphere that was so conducive to the spirit, you could almost taste it. It was like YASE all over again. :) by the end of the day, I almost didn’t care if I would be called to Nauvoo or not, I was just thankful for the opportunity to be involved in the callback and to interact with so many wonderful people. Luckily, as I found out the next day at 7:14 p.m. I did get a call. In some respects the next 5 months almost didn’t matter to me. All I wanted was to be in Nauvoo, singing and dancing and being immersed in the spirit all day every
day. But I did have to wait and thanks to the friends I made at the U be involved with the 2011 Student Elections, the waiting was bearable. ;)

So May 6, 2011 finally comes. And I board a plane headed for St. Louis, and then from there, a 3 hour bus ride to the City Beautiful. However, there was work to be done and we apparently weren’t going to waste any time. As soon as we were all together on the bus we were working and in 3 hours, we had 2 songs memorized before we even reached Nauvoo. And in the 3 rehearsal weeks to follow, our pace did not let up. :) Almost immediately I felt so inadequate. I thought to myself, “all of these other wonderful people are so much more talented than me, and their testimonies are so much stronger than mine. They are so much more righteous than I am. How can I even measure up…,” and within a week I was certain Elder and Sister Camp had made a mistake in calling me there and I was inches away from telling them I wasn’t cut out for it and I needed to leave. However, I realized that leaving was hardly an option… At this point, who were they going to get to replace me…? So instead to took my inadequacies to the Lord. I prayed for more talent and righteousness, so I could shine as bright as all the others around me. Miraculously, the Lord answered my prayer, again though, like so many times before, not in the way I imagined. He did not increase my talent, and the only person that can make me more righteous is me, but instead he gave me something even better: comfort and a sliver of confidence. He helped me know that when the Lord calls His missionaries, He doesn’t make mistakes. I was there for a purpose, a whole bunch of them, and as the summer progressed, that became incredibly apparent. Strength, perseverance, enduring to the end, angels, Joseph Smith, sacrifice, love, selflessness, and Joy are only a few of the wonderful things I learned about and gained testimony of this summer. It truly was the best three months of my life and the best three months for my life up to this point. I could go into all kinds of extraneous detail and tell stories, but I wouldn’t want to bore you, in fact I’m just lucky if you’re still reading at this point…

So now here I am 2 days before I enter the Missionary Training Center and am allowed to devote all my time and energy to others once more. How very blessed I am. In the words of a Sister Samantha Frizby, "The Church is SO True!" This is where I find Joy, in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. With Him, any task is possible and any trial is bearable. "I can do all things through Christ, which strengtheneth me." and I testify that we can not only live this life, we can thrive. We can find Joy, and I mean real, pure, celestial JOY in our lives. The church is so true.

I Find Joy: life story of a testimony

So I figured that for my first post, I would give some background, talk about the scripture that is in the blog description, and then go from there. :)

Background: I grew up in "mormonville" Utah and to be honest I really did absolutely love it. I wouldn't change the way I grew up for the all the episodes of Psych in the world. I have truly been blessed with a great family, good mentors, and the most fantastic friends a guy could hope for, even if I didn't always show them how important they are to me... However due to the unique culture of my home town, I also grew up on the "priesthood conveyor-belt" (aka: baptized-deacon-teacher-priest-missionary-marriage! Yay!!) And for the majority of my childhood and adolescence I was quite content with going with the flow. Moving in the direction that everyone around me seemed to expect.

It was my junior year of high school when that began to change. Not to say that I jumped of the assembly line and abandoned the things I had been and was being taught, but I suddenly became aware of myself and my actions. I actually invested a little in seminary and "church stuff" and a large factor in that were the wonderful seminary teachers I was given as I took early morning seminary. (which for those of you who live outside the world of released time, that is a rare and daring, even crazy thing for a teenager to do...)

Towards the middle of my senior year I fell into a bout of depression, and while I was not aware of it at the time, Satan gained a very strong and suppressing hold over my mind and feelings. I sincerely felt like there was not a soul on the earth who truly loved me, and that those who professed to, did so due to a social obligation. (It is funny how as soon as Satan begins messing with our heads, one of the first things he attacks, is our ability to think strait and see situations for what they really are...) Luckily, my Father in Heaven didn't leave me to fend for myself against an adversary I had no Idea was even attacking. Shortly before my mental state was the worst it had ever been, the Lord gave me a very close friend whom I now cherish. This friend came into my life, I'm certain at the Lord's command, and saved my life, and for that I owe him, and my Savior, more than any favor or gesture of love and thanks will ever measure up to.

As I had said, I did not at this time jump off the conveyor-belt, but became aware of what was happening in my life on a spiritual level and decided that I wanted to be proactive in making it towards the next step. I began to search out and gain my own testimony of my Savior. So then, again through my best friend, I found out about performing, but not just performing like I had been doing throughout much of high school, but performing for the Lord. The summer after I graduated I went to an efy like camp at BYU Called YASE. Young Ambassador Singing Entertainer (Workshop). the workshop part isn't included in the acronym because it doesn't roll off the tongue quite as well... but any who... I spent a week with nothing but music and the spirit, and it was wonderful!! my testimony grew so much in those six days I can barely describe.

And with that, I was hooked! As soon as I got home I was dying to find the next church related performance I could get involved in, and the first thing to cross my radar was a beautiful little show called Savior of The World: His birth and resurrection. That show is truly commissioned by God! That is where I gained a testimony of Jesus Christ. He is my Savior. He is every one's Savior. He was born for me. His lived for me. He Bled and Died for me. Despite what people may say about the Mormons and myself, it was the fall and Christmas of 2010, being involved with one of the most beautiful productions to grace a stage, that I became a Christian.

He is my Savior